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The Further Adventures of Ori L. Fannes

(int-  Deepest sub-basement of the Camden Yards Warehouse. Dark, but with flickers of light from "Emergency" signs and destroyed equipment)

(Evidence of an epic battle is everywhere, with blood soaking the cavernous walls and all sorts of mad scientist-type equipment in flames.  The body of a various grotesquely deformed affronts to humanity litter the floor, including a little green being with a perpetual sadface, a soft-armed cuban run-regurgitator, a weak-yet-strangely-resiliant human/horse hybrid, and a a two-headed abomination.)

(Showing that she has survived an ordeal most humans could not possibly imagine, Ori L. Fannes, our plucky heroine, holds the defeated body of the gnarled Troll, Ang Los, while her newfound ally Mack Fail stands behind her.)

ORI L. FANNES
Oh My God.  It's over.  Finally.....over.  The long nightmare....we can finally wake up from it!  With the help of Mack Fail and my special weapons, the sword of BLOG and the Walkout-In-Protest-Gun,  I've finally killed the destructive influence of Ang Los!

MACK FAIL
Yes.

(Ang Los gurgles and then begins to speak)

ANG LOS
You may think you've defeated me, Ori, but like the shadows of nightfall, I will return.  I will always return.

(He tries to laugh, but it comes out as a pathetic cough)

ORI
You just try, Ang.  I'll be ready for you!  Soon, Cal-the-Iron will be here, and together we'll make you just a sad sordid memory.  Just a story that parents use to scare their kids.  You're better off just staying away and playing in your land of Asbestos-lined dollars.

(While she is saying this, Ang Los begins to slowly look stronger and stronger)

ORI
One thing you need to understand, Ang, is that, no matter how long you keep my friends and I down - be it one year, two years, even ten - our hope keeps us alive.  We keep the old ways....the ones you scoff at...and they are what make us victorious!  You can't beat hope.  It makes us strongest.....

(BLAM!!!  A shot rings out.  Blood starts to dribble from Ori's mouth, as she realizes she's been shot in the back.  She turns around to see a smiling Mack Fail holding the smoking gun, marked with the word "Dusty")

ANG
Ha.  HAHA. HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA.  Silly girl. I never lose. As you can see, my influence reaches everyone! You think your mighty Cal will save you? Never.  I'll defeat him the same way I defeated Davey, JonMiller, Moose, and the others!

ORI (dropping to her knees)
Mack.....why?

ANG
Go ahead and show her, Mack....

(Mack reaches to his neck and starts to pull his mask off, revealing that he was wearing a disguise all along)

ORI
Oh NO!  Not you! Anyone but you! You're supposed to be dead!!!!!!

(Camera turns to Mack Fail's face to reveal that he is actually..........the Thrifty Syd!!!!)

ANG
Oh but don't worry, my dear.  You won't die.  I'll see to that.  You'll stay alive just so I can continue having my fun with you...  HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!

(To Be Continued......likely forever)

FanPosts are user-created content and do not necessarily reflect the views of the editors of Camden Chat or SB Nation. They might, though.

0 recs  |  Comment 10 comments

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Cal

Kruk-"Someone put this team together, and it wasn't the manager"

by dayzd toe on Jun 21, 2007 3:13 PM EDT reply actions   0 recs

props
since you were feeling left out over in the game thread :-)
"I love you guys....I hate you guys." --Eric Cartman

by Dave at Bottomfeeder Baseball on Jun 21, 2007 5:23 PM EDT reply actions   0 recs

Hmmmmm....
nice storyline...  strong plot...  great setting... and plenty of action...

Sure I'll take the lead role, thanks for considering me.  Just one thing...  I'll need more "sexy" in this script and I get to pick my supporting cast.


"DO YOUR WORST, ANGELOS." -SC

by dayzd toe on Jun 21, 2007 7:53 PM EDT reply actions   0 recs

Well....
....I'm all for actors showing great devotion to their craft, but I think you'll need a sex change to be the lead.....

I was going for a plucky Buffy-vibe for Ori.

This is not even a logo of the Baltimore Orioles baseball club

by Chanumas on Jun 22, 2007 11:01 AM EDT up reply actions   0 recs

true
I was talking about lead villain...  nah, you're right I f'ed up.

"DO YOUR WORST, ANGELOS." -SC

by dayzd toe on Jun 22, 2007 11:14 AM EDT up reply actions   0 recs

did i just get shot by peter angelos?
that motherfucker.
http://2632.blogspot.com

by 2632 on Jun 22, 2007 12:45 AM EDT reply actions   0 recs

no
you got shot by Syd Thrift

"DO YOUR WORST, ANGELOS." -SC

by dayzd toe on Jun 22, 2007 8:52 AM EDT up reply actions   0 recs

Who bought the gun
with Confederate money
"Terry Crowley's lucky he's in ?^(&!^$ baseball, for @#&!$+ sake." - Earl Weaver, Manager's Corner

by duck on Jun 22, 2007 7:33 PM EDT up reply actions   0 recs

Kudos Chanumas!
Now let's talk film rights...
Hey Petey: enjoy THIS!

by Titov on Jun 23, 2007 3:55 AM EDT reply actions   0 recs

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