Worst baseball movie ever
I normally work from home; and I do so with the TV on in the background. Just so happens that today Showtime had a movie on that I've never heard of, "Joe Torre, Curveballs All the Way," which was about the Yankees 1996 season. It has to be the worst movie I've ever seen associated with baseball. So bad that it was entertaining, until the end that is. The Maier incident wasn't portrayed as a bad call and unfortunate incident, but rather an act from Joe's dead brother. Even though I knew the ending was coming, it still gave me douche chills.
It got me wondering, what are the most god awful baseball movies out there (that have actually been seen). I always hated Bull Durham in the same way that I hated Jerry McGwuire; but I don't think I would list that as one of the all time bad movies and I know most people loved it. The Pete Rose story was quite bad as was Babe. Major League 3?
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Fever Pitch
Absolutely atrocious in every single way, up to and most certainly including the extremely lame, out of place, pointless gay jokes.
We are in complete agreement.
This movie was not only fucking horrifyingly awful – it also had both Drew Barrymore and Jimmy Fallon in leading roles…and in love!!! That’s like some kind of Trifecta of a Horrorshow.
Jimmy Fallon+Drew Barrymore+Boston Red Sox= Me never seeing this movie
http://oriolecentral.wordpress.com
the only way i'll watch a movie romanticizing a red sox .. or even a yankee fan..
is if it is similar in style to Brokeback Mountain. Then it would be funny and most likely enjoyable.
i like fever pitch
because Miguel Tejada hits the foul ball that hits Drew Barrymore in the head
by NickMarkaces on Apr 23, 2008 12:54 AM EDT up reply actions
I felt obligated to see "Fever Pitch"
because I happened to be at the game against the D-Rays when they filmed the original ending; the one with Drew Barrymore running across the field. Johnny Damon came out to try and do a couple of takes to be in the movie (because Johnny Damon is a dick) but became so wooden and awful they sent him off.
Note that having been there to see the filming of the ending did in no way change the fact that movie was violently awful.
"Might as well just win this game." - Adam Jones, 4/17/2008
Adam Jones is the tits.
by KenDixonFanClub on Apr 23, 2008 2:23 PM EDT up reply actions
Thanks for ruining a perfectfly good Nick Hornsby book, Fallon.
/punches Jimmy Fallon
And this is for laughing during every comedy sketch you’ve ever been in! Who do you think you are, Carol Burnett? You think she did it so it’s all right for you? You haven’t earned what she’s earned!
What is best in life? To crush your enemies, see them driven before you, and to hear the lamentation of the women.
by Ghost of Floyd Rayford on Apr 22, 2008 9:06 AM EDT up reply actions
I really can't say enough about Fever Pitch
It is grotesque. It’s like what would happen if Adam Sandler were given High Fidelity and instead of Serious Adam Sandler, he called up all his douchebag friends and made a Big Daddy type of movie out of it. Fuck.
I couldn't sum up my feelings for Farrelly brothers movies with just 'hatred'
because its so much more than just hatred. Screw those guys! Geez, now you got me all pissed.
Maybe in order to understand mankind, we have to look at the word itself: "Mankind". Basically, it's made up of two separate words—"mank" and "ind". What do these words mean? It's a mystery, and that's why so is mankind.
-Jack Handey
Oh come now
You hate this?

Kingpin kicked ass. Particularly Ernie “Big Ern” McCracken. This was one of the best comedic villain performances of all time.
The Farrelly’s have plenty of stinkers, I’ll grant you that (Fever Pitch chief among them). But honestly that’s true of virtually every comedy director/writer/performer etc out there. It is so hard to be funny for 90-120 minutes and jokes and sometimes entire movies even are going to fall flat. You basically have to throw whatever you have at the wall and see what sticks – and if people laugh half the time, you’ll be hailed as a genius.
"She said she had a.......(lots of laughter)"
I just remember seeing the preview for that movie ten million times when it came out, and it pissed me off every time.
Maybe in order to understand mankind, we have to look at the word itself: "Mankind". Basically, it's made up of two separate words—"mank" and "ind". What do these words mean? It's a mystery, and that's why so is mankind.
-Jack Handey
Pfft. Whatever.
Chanumas has a big butt! Chanumas has a big butt!
That scene makes me feel horrible inside
That movie makes me feel horrible inside. Its not in the same galaxy as Little Big league.
Maybe in order to understand mankind, we have to look at the word itself: "Mankind". Basically, it's made up of two separate words—"mank" and "ind". What do these words mean? It's a mystery, and that's why so is mankind.
-Jack Handey
oh god no
Little Big League is a straight up good ass baseball movie that the whole family can enjoy and also has an incredible soundtrack. Rookie of the Year is just a kids piece of crap. And even by those standards it’s a piece of crap. I mean, The Mighty Ducks and D2 were of the same time.
by Scott Christ on Apr 22, 2008 6:45 AM EDT up reply actions
Little Big League sux dongs.
It could have been okay. It could have been Rookie of the Year, which is actually entertaining. Instead, the kid they got to play the manager looks like he’s actually a 40 year old pretending to be a kid. He gives the impression that when the game’s over he’s going to knock back three fingers of Glenfidditch rather than some chocolate milk.
Not only that, but the baseball scenes are freaking awful. You can tell that each one is choreographed.
And Mickey Tettleton’s cameo could have been performed by a cardboard cutout of Mickey Tettleton. How can a catcher look so wooden when they tell him to act like he’s moving to catch a foul ball? “Welcome-to-the-big-leagues-kid-I-am-MT5000-at-your-service”.
Yeah, I’ve seen it recently. So?
From the Land of Pleasant Living...
no, i'm not.
I’m merely allergic to plots that involve Timothy Busfield as some sort of athlete.
From the Land of Pleasant Living...
Benchwarmers
When you consider that cast - three terribly unfunny guys in the three biggest roles - it’s really not all that bad. Napoleon Dynamite, as always, doesn’t do a single remotely humorous thing, but Rob Schneider toning it down actually sort of worked.
I thought it was funny!
My favorite is the 30-year old guy who poses as a 12 year old.. he reminds me of… Miguel Tejeda…
I used to think "The Fan"
because of the scene with Wesley Snipes batting at the end in a monsoon (can’t find a good screen capture anywhere of the scene). I figured, “British director, he didn’t even bother reading up on baseball – nobody plays in the rain!:
But then I saw this last year:
and I guess it isn’t so ridiculous anymore.
"I win! I think I'm better at chess than you, Dad." - My 7 year old, after he beat me for the first (and not last) time.
Safe At Home
A ‘62 or ‘63 attempt to cash in on Maris & Mantle was God-awful bad.
You can't fix stupid. Stupid is forever.
Don't forget...
...this this Freddie Prinze Jr. tour de force.
MAGIC MAGIC MAGIC MAGIC MAGIC MAGIC MAGIC MAGIC
no comparison...
to the skilled freddie prinze, sr., but, jessice biel.
that’s all.
"Well, I've been to one world fair, a picnic, and a rodeo, and that's the stupidest thing I ever heard come over a set of earphones."
by j.q. higgins on Apr 21, 2008 5:15 PM EDT up reply actions
UGH
This was my vote. Went and saw it on a date and halfway through, we both decided to walk out. Only that bastard Freddie Prinze could bastardized baseball into a chick flick enima from hell. (I didn’t like this movie by the way).
http://oriolecentral.wordpress.com
Agreed
Anytime you put Freddie Prinze Jr. and Matthew Lillard on screen, you end up with a big bag o’ shit.
What is best in life? To crush your enemies, see them driven before you, and to hear the lamentation of the women.
by Ghost of Floyd Rayford on Apr 22, 2008 8:57 AM EDT up reply actions
WHAT?!
you don’t like the scooby doo movies?
J/K!
"Well, I've been to one world fair, a picnic, and a rodeo, and that's the stupidest thing I ever heard come over a set of earphones."
by j.q. higgins on Apr 22, 2008 9:15 AM EDT up reply actions
Field of Dreams
The worst, most treacly sentimental crap ever. Crap, crap, crap.
by Joltin Joe Orsulak on Apr 21, 2008 9:52 PM EDT reply actions
Dude, you are wrong
Its the best treacly sentimental crap ever.
Seriously, when he plays catch with his dad at the end of the movie, how can you not cry?
MAGIC MAGIC MAGIC MAGIC MAGIC MAGIC MAGIC MAGIC
my +1 is for spike, not SC, just to be clear.
I LOVE field of dreams, despite Costner’s Costnernesss.
I actually like Costner a lot of the time
Open Range? Rules. A Perfect World? Rules.
I haven’t seen FoD in years—I’ll give it a go again. Maybe it’d work for me now. I probably last saw it when I was 16/17. I think it’s On Demand.
by Scott Christ on Apr 21, 2008 11:17 PM EDT up reply actions
16/17 year olds may be too jaded for that movie...
Definitely see it again.
MAGIC MAGIC MAGIC MAGIC MAGIC MAGIC MAGIC MAGIC
Dramaticized re-enactment of that scene:
Kevin Costner: ”... Dad….... do you want to play catch…?”
Me: “Be strong. Be strong. Men don’t cry.”
10 seconds later: sobbing uncontrollably… old lady sitting next to me hands me tissue and says, “Now now. It’s alright.”
by Y Not on Apr 22, 2008 7:06 AM EDT up reply actions 1 recs
Costner
Good Costner: Bull Durham, Field of Dreams, Silverado, No Way Out. Leg cameo in Big Chill.
Bearable Costner: Dances with Wolves, A Perfect World
Uggh: Everything else.
I’ve never heard of Open Range. What’s that?
Open Range
Hell of a good western. Robert Duvall is in it. That’s a +1 every time.
To all the Bull Durham haters…huh? Totally righteous script by Ron Shelton (ex-O’s farmhand, as the Sun will tell you EVERY GODDAMN TIME his name is brought up). Great shots of DAP. Bitchin’ late 80’s minor league unis. There is very little wrong with Bull Durham.
Summer Catch & The Sandlot 2…the pennant chase of suck.
What is best in life? To crush your enemies, see them driven before you, and to hear the lamentation of the women.
by Ghost of Floyd Rayford on Apr 22, 2008 9:01 AM EDT up reply actions
Yeah, Sandlot 2 was bad
Not that Sandlot 1 was a prize. Did they make a Sandlot 3?
MAGIC MAGIC MAGIC MAGIC MAGIC MAGIC MAGIC MAGIC

One of the killer modern Westerns. Entirely overlooked. You wanna talk gunfights, good Lord.
by Scott Christ on Apr 22, 2008 9:02 AM EDT up reply actions
JFK
Great film making.
Lousy history lesson.
Michael Baden’s book “Unnatural Death” covers the forensics of the Kennedy shooting. In less than 15 pages, he shows how ballistics, forensics and re-enactments all show Oswald shot alone. Not to start THAT conversation, but just sayin….
Don’t depend on Oliver Stone for history lessons.
/Baden was the head forensics guy for OJ, by the way.
"I win! I think I'm better at chess than you, Dad." - My 7 year old, after he beat me for the first (and not last) time.
Are there people in the world
who depend on Oliver Stone for history lessons?
I liked JFK myself. Also The Untouchables as long as we’re talking Kevin Costner.
I also find myself enjoying Robin Hood: Prince of Thieves when it’s on TV, although I recognize that it sucks even as I’m watching it.
Untouchables didn't do it for me
Not big on De Palma.
by Scott Christ on Apr 22, 2008 10:18 AM EDT up reply actions
if platoon is somewhat autobiographical..
makes it even more interesting.
but i agree… JFK’s a little out there…
Unfortunately...
yeah, yeah there are.
"I win! I think I'm better at chess than you, Dad." - My 7 year old, after he beat me for the first (and not last) time.
My questions are the same as Mr. X's
Who benefited? Who had the power to cover it up?
I don’t know a whole lot about forensics & ballistics & don’t much care if Oswald was the only shooter or not.
What I flat out refuse to accept is that Oswald was the only one who knew what was going to happen before it happened. And that means conspiracy & cover up, even if I don’t connect the dots in quite the same way Stone does.
You can't fix stupid. Stupid is forever.
Oswald was the lone shooter
As for the rest, well, forensics doesn’t tell us that. Speculate away.
"I win! I think I'm better at chess than you, Dad." - My 7 year old, after he beat me for the first (and not last) time.
My personal guess
is that it was a mob hit
President or not, you just don’t sleep with Sam Giancanna’s girl.
You can't fix stupid. Stupid is forever.
I actually liked...
For the Love of the Game.
Although I do acknowledge that there were parts of it that sucked.
MAGIC MAGIC MAGIC MAGIC MAGIC MAGIC MAGIC MAGIC
Problems
It’s sooooo damn manipulative (and obviously, heavy-handedly so; I mean, most movies are to some degree, but this goes way, way overboard) and it takes itself so damn seriously that it pisses me way off.
Crappy movies like Summer Catch know that they’re crappy movies; they’re just the same old stuff that studios turn out over and over again and don’t have any pretense. Field of Dreams is crap that thinks that it’s profound.
by Joltin Joe Orsulak on Apr 22, 2008 10:10 PM EDT up reply actions
how about...
mr. 3000? sort of a shame, b/c it seems like a good role for bernie mac, but it’s just not very good…and i can’t abide the historical inaccuracies!
"Well, I've been to one world fair, a picnic, and a rodeo, and that's the stupidest thing I ever heard come over a set of earphones."
I thought it was an OK movie. Told a better story baseball-wise than a lot of movies do. But the Bernie/Angela Bassett storyline was awful.
by Scott Christ on Apr 22, 2008 10:19 AM EDT up reply actions
You people need to see "The Comrades of Summer"
Actually, you don’t. In fact, if you believe Variety, you’d probably opt for a root canal instead:
“If the entertainment industry’s servile veneration of baseball provokes any more groveling paeans like this, the national pastime could easily fall behind dwarf-tossing and spotted-owl hunting as an acceptable sport.”
It isn’t that bad. I happen to like Joe Mantegna, and the Russian female lead, Natalya Negoda, is both cute and an accomplished actress (which you can’t easily tell from this film, predicatbly; see her in “Little Vera” if you can).
Anyway, this is one…strange…film. My “Other” vote was really for the Oddest Baseball Film you’ll ever see. Or won’t, if your luck holds.
http://www.imdb.com/title/tt0103997/
Rah Rah Rasputin / Lover of the Russian queen
There was a cat that / Really loved Birds. -- Boney M
The Comrades of Summer rocked Titov!!!
When the 3rd baseman, who used to be the shot putter on the Soviet National Olympic Team, dives for the foul ball a comes up bloody but holding the ball….well I …just sorta get choked up.
"Daddy, is Hevan like BIRDLAND?"
"No son, Hevan is BIRDLAND."
by BENNY BIRDMAN on Apr 22, 2008 5:41 PM EDT up reply actions
You must be kidding
This is an actual movie?
I figured the link was a rickroll…
"I win! I think I'm better at chess than you, Dad." - My 7 year old, after he beat me for the first (and not last) time.
duck, bro, would I MAKE UP a title like that?
And I agree, why rev Dealey up again when we agree that Lee Harvey was a shooter…
Rah Rah Rasputin / Lover of the Russian queen
There was a cat that / Really loved Birds. -- Boney M
Hey, it has its moments-- and for you that's clearly one of 'em. Enjoy. But whoa, it is one..strange...baseball epic,
left dangling in the breeze somewhere between perestroika and post-Soviet whatever. On the other hand, we shouldn’t forget that there is a Russian in the Baseball Hall of Fame.
Of course, it’s the Japanese Baseball Hall of Fame, but still. We get a nice rain delay, I’ll lay that one out.
Rah Rah Rasputin / Lover of the Russian queen
There was a cat that / Really loved Birds. -- Boney M
Dont know which is worst
but Sandlot 2 and Benchwarmers were two of the worst movies ever
and this is coming from someone who finds almost every movie moderately entertaining at least
However if you see benchwarmers with other people its fun to laugh at but still really shitty
Lovitz is genuinely great in Benchwarmers
It really isn’t anywhere near as bad as one might expect out of Schneider, Spade, and the awful, awful, awful, awful Jon Heder.
Sandlot 2 should have been in the poll. It was disgusting. Sandlot is corny little kid shit (the baseball was fun, the shit with the dog less so) mixed with nostalgic old man shit. WHEN I WAS A YOUNGSTER, BASEBALL THIS THIS THIS AND THAT.
by Scott Christ on Apr 23, 2008 1:34 AM EDT up reply actions
Lovitz is one of the most consistently amusing (and generally likeable) actors in Hollywood,
who is making a career out of being underused (joining Eugene Levy in that category). No that he (or Levy) should have star vehicles coming out every other year, but still…
Each has a rare, kinda quirky quality that can turn a piece o’ crapola into something watchable while they are doing their thing in it, even with weak lines. “Rat Race”—a major disapointment (look at that cast!) rescued in places by the likes of Lovitz (the Barbie Museum) and Seth Green. Or “The Man”, an awful derivative which Levy occasionally resuscitates.
Rah Rah Rasputin / Lover of the Russian queen
There was a cat that / Really loved Birds. -- Boney M

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