Morneau wins Derby, Hamilton makes history

by SC on Jul 14, 2008 11:00 PM EDT

Justin Morneau won the 2008 Home Run Derby, making me a genius or a wizard, but no one will remember that. The man he out-donged in the final round, Josh Hamilton, was the story.

If you missed it, find his first round performance on the internet ASAP. Just amazing stuff. 28 home runs. Massive shots -- 504 feet, 502 feet, 497, and so on. His average length was 445 in the first round. And he had the familiar Hamilton story being repeated all night, plus a 71-year old American Legion baseball coach throwing the balls for him.

Amazing stuff, and truly special. It was ridiculous to watch.

The other great memorable moment of the Home Run Derby you need to track down on the internet?

Chase Utley is introduced before the Derby, reaches the foul line, and says, "Boo? F--k you!"

Classic.

The All-Star commentary team featured Chris Berman, Joe Morgan and Steve Phillips sitting at one unholy desk of pure evil, plus Karl Ravech, John Kruk (who defined it as "sad!" that people were going ape for everything after Hamilton's Herculean display), the increasingly gomer-y Peter Gammons, and Rick Reilly, who had a fit over the fact that all eight hitters in the contest happened to be white, which was ill-timed, out of place, and utterly pointless. Maybe Mr. Lookitme! should stay on the back pages of magazines.

The final moments of the Derby are happening right now, with Morneau being presented his trophy and the State Farm $50,000 check to the Boys & Girls Club and all that.

The State Farm dude says, "Jason, ya came through tonight."

Erin Andrews makes a face, then moments later says, "Mr. Justin Marneau."

Followed by an MLB official saying, "Justin Merneau."

And Gary Thorne has just welcomed me to the Taco Bell Legends and Celebrities All-Star Softball Game.

Fantastic stuff. You can't beat the Home Run Derby.

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Justin Tuck being called out at home was a bum call. His foot got in before the tag.

"Yesterday I was lying, today I am telling the truth." -- Bob Arum

Camden Chat
Bad Left Hook

by SC on Jul 14, 2008 11:12 PM EDT 0 recs

I thought so too.

"Jeremy Guthrie’s funny. Sneaky funny. Smart funny. Stanford funny."
-Kevbo

by dayzd toe on Jul 15, 2008 8:37 AM EDT up 0 recs

also

Wade Boggs wearing a Yankees hat? You sellout dork.

"Yesterday I was lying, today I am telling the truth." -- Bob Arum

Camden Chat
Bad Left Hook

by SC on Jul 14, 2008 11:12 PM EDT 0 recs

I'm glad the gang at Cheers stole your pants

"Yesterday I was lying, today I am telling the truth." -- Bob Arum

Camden Chat
Bad Left Hook

by SC on Jul 14, 2008 11:12 PM EDT up 0 recs

love kenny mayne

and since when does that kid from corey in the house get to play in this. he is no big celebrity.

by semaj2989 on Jul 14, 2008 11:39 PM EDT 0 recs

You obviously don't have kids....

"I wasn't here for the losing years. But it feels a little like the days with Earl in charge and John Lowenstein smashing birthday cakes in the middle of the clubhouse with a bat." - John "T-Bone" Shelby

by duck on Jul 15, 2008 8:18 AM EDT up 0 recs

WOW!!!

That’s all I can say about Josh Hamilton. 28 freaking jacks in one round??! You got to be kidding me! It’s definitely something I will remember for the rest of my life. I’m still stunned!

Geaux Eaux's

by NawlinsOriole on Jul 15, 2008 3:21 AM EDT 0 recs

Good show

I tried real hard to ignore the Derby, but tuned in anyway just as Hamilton got started. That was an ungodly display. I think my favorite part was watching the other All-Stars react to him like they were children and he was their daddy.

by Bee the Ball on Jul 15, 2008 8:09 AM EDT up 0 recs

yeah that's always fun

Ortiz walking off the field (to boos), Volquez delivering a mysterious briefcase, Bradley wiping Hamilton’s forehead and bringing Counsil some water.

"Yesterday I was lying, today I am telling the truth." -- Bob Arum

Camden Chat
Bad Left Hook

by SC on Jul 15, 2008 11:00 AM EDT up 0 recs

You can't forget...

autographing the ball for the kids and Kinsler freaking out when he hit that bomb off the Bank of America sign. (That was one of the most amazing HR’s I’ve ever seen in my life.)

Geaux Eaux's

by NawlinsOriole on Jul 15, 2008 1:04 PM EDT up 0 recs

the Bank of America homer

The whole stadium just exploded. Chris Berman was even forced to shut up and go, “Did that just go where we think it did?!” Frankly I wouldn’t be surprised if he missed it and some producer went, “Hey, ‘Boom,’ he just hit the fucking sign, pay attention.”

"Yesterday I was lying, today I am telling the truth." -- Bob Arum

Camden Chat
Bad Left Hook

by SC on Jul 15, 2008 1:21 PM EDT up 0 recs

I missed Chase...

but my wife was on top of it for me and told me to rewind the ol’ DVR… Sure enough, “Boo? Fuck You.” I’ll surprised if the FCC doesn’t have something to say about that, ‘cause it sure didn’t sound bleeped to me. Also, tell that motherfucker to shut the hell up about race already. Jesus Christ!!! Very awkward, but there’s apparently ALWAYS someone who will make race an issue.

"Jeremy Guthrie’s funny. Sneaky funny. Smart funny. Stanford funny."
-Kevbo

by dayzd toe on Jul 15, 2008 8:40 AM EDT 0 recs

The over/under was WAY too low!!!

And Jim Palmer wasn’t even there.

"Jeremy Guthrie’s funny. Sneaky funny. Smart funny. Stanford funny."
-Kevbo

by dayzd toe on Jul 15, 2008 8:41 AM EDT 0 recs

well truthfully

It was just supposed to be for his up, and I didn’t expect him to be up there for like 25 minutes.

"Yesterday I was lying, today I am telling the truth." -- Bob Arum

Camden Chat
Bad Left Hook

by SC on Jul 15, 2008 11:01 AM EDT up 0 recs

Celebrity/Legend Softball Game

Unfortunately I had a play rehearsal and got home right after the Derby ended. But at least I got to hear Three Beers Gary rag on Kenny Mayne for an hour or so. In the first inning, Paul O’Neill (still a dick) hit a home run and they started gushing about how Billy Crystal was getting to cross home plate in HISTORICYANKEESTADIUM just ahead of YANKEEGREATPAULO’NEILL…and I actually started rooting for the National League. In a freaking softball game. Hell, that’s even before I realized that Whoopi Goldberg was also playing for the AL.

I will never get tired of seeing Rollie Fingers rocking the handlebar ‘stache and socking dingers.

Chris Rock was atrocious. He struck out on three pitches and I believe butchered at least one play at shortstop. Insert Bynum/Fahey/Luis Luis joke here.

I may never eat at Taco Bell again, after having to hear “DONG! DONG! DONG!” after each home run.

All that said, I’m a sucker for these games. This might be the day of the year that I miss Harold Reynolds the most.

by Brotz13 on Jul 15, 2008 9:09 AM EDT 0 recs

paul o'neill?

i thought he was fiarly innocuous. it’s tino martinez STILL crying about being nailed in the back by armando benitez that pisses me off. what a fucking baby.

foghat goes with everything--birdman, 5/16/08

by j.q. higgins on Jul 15, 2008 9:17 AM EDT up 0 recs

O'Neill

is one of the biggest blubbereyed crybabies in the modern history of base ball. He was a baby in Cincinnati and he took that act to pinstripes. Mother F Paul O’Neill. I did, however, think his final game at Yankee Stadium was cool. They treated him like he was Mickey Mantle or something.

"Yesterday I was lying, today I am telling the truth." -- Bob Arum

Camden Chat
Bad Left Hook

by SC on Jul 15, 2008 11:04 AM EDT up 0 recs

really?

i found that era of yankees, outside of derek awesome, mariano rivera and tino the kleenex, fairly indistinguishable outside of their general “playing the game the right way” bullshit. i’ll take your word for it.

foghat goes with everything--birdman, 5/16/08

by j.q. higgins on Jul 15, 2008 11:06 AM EDT up 0 recs

I think DONG! DONG! DONG!

should be played after EVERY home run. Just not the Taco Bell version of DONG! DONG! DONG!

You know who stunk? The guy from Desperate Housewives. Have you never in your life held a bat, dillweed? Of course, he probably hasn’t, really, he was probably busy with theater camps and shit like that, and now he’s rich and playing softball at Yankee Stadium and I’m a schmuck. But I know how to hold a bat.

...goddamn it.

"Yesterday I was lying, today I am telling the truth." -- Bob Arum

Camden Chat
Bad Left Hook

by SC on Jul 15, 2008 11:03 AM EDT up 0 recs

That's funny

He’s a huge baseball fan. He calls in and talks to the guys on XM Radio quite a bit and he always knows what he’s talking about. Not that it translates into him being a good player, but you’d think he at least would know the stuff like, you know, bat holding.

"We’re not concerned about what other teams think. I know teams come in here thinking we’re playing the Orioles. And then 9 innings later, they got the loss, they know what we’re about." ~Adam Jones

by Stacey on Jul 15, 2008 11:09 AM EDT up 0 recs

does anyone know...

why howard and that quintessential base-clogging, rally-killing slugger adam dunn weren’t involved? call me crazy, but it strikes me that those two guys are the pre-eminent, in their prime sluggers in the game right now.

maybe a good future format: top 3 al, nl in hr at some pre-determined, pre-break cutoff; previous years hr champs from al, nl; preious year’s home run derby finalists.

foghat goes with everything--birdman, 5/16/08

by j.q. higgins on Jul 15, 2008 9:16 AM EDT 0 recs

They weren't All Stars!

Jeez Louise with this already. IT’S THE HOME RUN DERBY.

by Awesome Mike Awesome on Jul 15, 2008 9:22 AM EDT up 0 recs

oh...

jeez louise, indeed.

foghat goes with everything--birdman, 5/16/08

by j.q. higgins on Jul 15, 2008 11:07 AM EDT up 0 recs

The whole point of this thread was to talk about the the home run derby. If you care so little, don’t read the thread. Seems simple to me.

"He’s in trouble. Whatever he throws me, I’m going to hit it."
-- Alex Cintron

by BrianS on Jul 15, 2008 12:31 PM EDT up 0 recs

We had a lengthy talk about this whole thing during the Derby. I think that’s where he was coming from.

"Yesterday I was lying, today I am telling the truth." -- Bob Arum

Camden Chat
Bad Left Hook

by SC on Jul 15, 2008 12:32 PM EDT up 0 recs

Well then

continue with the wringing of hands that the derby was lacking because it didn’t have two players not good enough to make the god damn All Star team.

by Awesome Mike Awesome on Jul 15, 2008 1:25 PM EDT up 0 recs

good ain't got nothing to do w/ it.

why you talkin crazy?

foghat goes with everything--birdman, 5/16/08

by j.q. higgins on Jul 15, 2008 1:59 PM EDT up 0 recs

Guys are going to pass on it, especially the dudes not in the All-Star game. Players not in the game cherish their three days off.

"Yesterday I was lying, today I am telling the truth." -- Bob Arum

Camden Chat
Bad Left Hook

by SC on Jul 15, 2008 12:20 PM EDT up 0 recs

You forgot to mention...

...Hamilton’s longest shot, which went 518 feet, way up the third deck in right field, just short of our favorite son, Sammy Sosa, who hit it 524 feet in 2005. God bless Sammy! Beisball has bin berry, berry goot to him!

Rexx

by Rexx on Jul 15, 2008 9:32 AM EDT 0 recs

I thought I was forgetting one big one. That was the third-longest behind Sammy and Frank (‘94 in Pittsburgh, IIRC).

Man and some of his shots hit shit before they were really ready to come down.

"Yesterday I was lying, today I am telling the truth." -- Bob Arum

Camden Chat
Bad Left Hook

by SC on Jul 15, 2008 11:05 AM EDT up 0 recs