OT: Titov’s Ka-chingular Bowl Spread Beaters (Dec. 18-31)
by Titov on Dec 17, 2010 4:21 PM EST
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Print“The bowls are alive / with the sound of money…” Right, like I know anything about Miami of OH and, er, Middle Tennessee State. For all I know it could be Middle Earth State.
But I do know a funky spread when I see one, and there are 5 or 6 pretty funkadelic cases you can make some nice scratch on here, most likely -- and they won’t be hard to spot. The other 29 game spreads are pretty much dart-throwing – unless you do this for a living, like a real Mr. Vegas Guy – but it’s fun dart throwing, and good for the wrist. So here goes nuttin’:
December 18, 2010
New Mexico Bowl: BYU (-11 ½ ) vs. UTEP. Let’s start off with an easy one: the Utterly Marginal Bowl, with two 6-6 teams, only one of which can escape with a winning season – doesn’t that just make you wanna watch? BYU has a bowlier history (by far); take them and the 11.5 and we’re off and counting green.
Humanitarian Bowl: N. Illinois (-1 ½) vs. Fresno State. You look at this line and say Uh, what? NIU is a Crappy Conf runner-up, FSU is a good WAC team that owes sth to fans in Boise, btw, after getting waxed there. Gimme the Frezzies here, easy – even the Yahoo Users have doped this out.
New Orleans Bowl: Troy (-2) vs. Ohio. Futility battles tedium in this one, played before a fine audience of friends and relatives, no doubt. At least it’s in New Orleans, so they’ll have sth to do. I mean, think of the poor shlubs in Boise that day. What the hell was Second Prize? Anyway, for this pointless numb-fest I say take the Rubbers, who at least gave OK St a good game.
December 21, 2010
Beef O'Brady's Bowl: Louisville (-3) vs. Southern Miss. If I knew what on God’s green earth Beef O’Brady was, I’d know how to pick this game, which I don’t. OK, look, LV didn’t beat one good team this year; S. Miss. did—and they’re the dog. Arf-arf, sez I.
December 22, 2010
Maaco Bowl: Utah vs. Boise State (-17). Do I really need to rehearse the backstory here for you? Boise finally got shut up by Kaepernick & Co. (and their own kicker) and Utah played two of the most mystifyingly bad games in a row you’ll ever want to see from an undefeated Top 10 team. I think Boise’s still angrier, and by a long shot. Take ‘em.
December 23, 2010
Poinsettia Bowl: San Diego State (-4 ½ ) vs. Navy. This is a home game for the Tecs, and it’s against a team that lost to Duke. That’s right, Duke. Yeah, I know, Dago has already cost me money this year, and they’ve been champs at the close loss vs. quality opps. But I want em at 4 ½. I just do.
December 24, 2010
Hawaii Bowl: Hawaii (-10 ½) vs. Tulsa. The generous spread here (at least it’s down 2 this week) makes this hard to call. I really like HA, and I don’t doubt they’ll win this – but it may prove tough to do by 10 ½ , so I’m placing my chips on that result with a shaky hand. C’mon, Bows, make me lookunnecessarily weak-kneed.
December 26, 2010
Little Caesars Pizza Bowl: Toledo (-1 ½ ) vs. FIU. Right, I’m on top of this one. Let’s see, if the dart lands inside the metal thing *below* the 20, it’s a triple score, right? I can honestly say I have never seen either of these two teams play and have no intention of breaking this winning streak. But I’ll take the warm weather team in air conditioning, thanks.
December 27, 2010
Independence Bowl: Air Force (-3) vs. Georgia Tech. These are option teams which can’t throw and wisely don’t – but they run maniacally, and if that’s your thing you’ll love this game, during which I’ll be enjoying a good book. Anyway, take AFA at 3 and may the Force be with you.
December 28, 2010
Champs Sports Bowl: N.C. State vs. West Virginia (-3). Two teams who’ve done well at unexpected junctures this year, winning 8 and 9 respectively in the end. You can’t not like the WVU defense, which I’ll say is at least 3 better than Wilson can throw up there (before he hits the MLB draft).
Insight Bowl: Iowa vs. Missouri (-1). If you’re waiting for me to say I don’t have any particular insight on this one, you win: I don’t. Missouri had another of its overrated years and IA finished on a nice 3-slide that turned a pretty good season mediocre. Hey, roll the dice. I’ll take Mizzou to block.
December 29, 2010
Texas Bowl: Illinois vs. Baylor (-1 ½ ). I dunno. Or care. Hey, its’ Big Dim vs. Big Twerp middle o’ the packers. Both these teams played the last month of the season like they were double parked – and I’m supposed to bet on one of ‘em? OK, IL’s losses were contested (and they won a game, too). So gimme them. And pass the darts.
Alamo Bowl: Arizona vs. Oklahoma State (-5 ½ ). Zona is not a good bet here, as they came out on a 4-streak heading south and don’t have an impressive bowl record, while OK St had a remarkable season – and man can they put up pts. I’d love to be surprised by a sudden Zona revival – Foles and Criner are capable of putting a lot of damage on anybody – but I don’t expect it and can’t bet it. Take State.
Military Bowl: Maryland (-7) vs. E. Carolina. ECU is a true Jekyll and Hide, with one of the most offensive O’s and one of the least defensive D’s on record. MD was better than expected, and will prolly do a 7’s worth here, if anybody in the District is interested. I confess I’m not. But hey, don’t let me down, Terps, Just because I’m not watching doesn’t mean I don’t need the money.
December 30, 2010
Pinstripe Bowl: Syracuse vs. Kansas State (pick ‘em). The interesting thing about this game is that it will take place in Yerkee Stadium, and the refs will wear pinstripe jerseys. Hey, I said interesting, not important: these two teams are not very good and probably deserve the foot of snow that may land on them. I guess I’ll take K-State, for reasons too arcane to pursue here. And I made up the pinstripe jerseys thing.
Music City Bowl: North Carolina (-2) vs. Tennessee. Another case of How Can These Two Teams Be Playing On Live Television In A Bowl Game? But there you are. It’s in Nashville, so I guess you take TN. Carolina had an unimpressive year – though at least they edged by Duke [!] sideways. You may doze off watching this one. Try it at the gym, on the treadmill.
Armed Forces Bowl: SMU (-8) vs. Army. Not to be confused with the Military Bowl, which is, like, a different shape of bowl altogether. Or something. Anyway, Army also beat Duke, which is a Good Thing, but they made up for it by losing to a crappy Rutgers team. SMU is not very good, but prolly 8 pts gooder here.
Holiday Bowl: Washington vs. Nebraska (-14). This is a replay, of course, of that disaster in Seattle, which would make anyone betting the Dogs as the dog here a certifiable head case. OK, pull out the straitjacket: I say Locker plays the game of his life – and his last in college – and U Dub beats this 14 spread. Go ahead, laugh. Yes, I’ve had too much to drink. You wanna step outside and say that?
December 31, 2010
Meineke Car Care Bowl: Clemson (-4 ½) vs. South Florida. Did You Know? The University of South Florida is not in, er, south Florida. Look at the map. I’ll wait. See? Anyway, it would take a moron to bet this game seriously – and a retarded moron to watch it – since there is no offense to speak of on either team. But I watched SF beat Miami (that’s the kind of moron I am) so gimme them here at 4.5.
Liberty Bowl: UCF vs. Georgia (-6 ½). Did You Know? The University of Central Florida IS in central Florida. So that’s a Good Thing. Also, it claims to be the nation’s 3rd largest university, which is kind of a scary thought. I mean, all those caps ‘n’ gowns ‘n’ Mickey Mouse ears for people majoring in Disney Studies there in Orlando. Anyway, their football team is probably better than Georgia’s, a middling entry in America’s Most Overrated Conference. So Mickey sez take UCF to beat that 6.5.
Sun Bowl: Miami (-3) vs. Notre Dame. Yikes, MORE not-very-good-teams haunting your television. Miamuh looked dazed and confused losing to USF (so long, coach) and ND’s wandering-around season couldn’t be redeemed by a good Utah performance or the SC gift. Do I have to bet on this? Aw, mom! OK, take the ‘Canes.
Chick-fil-A Bowl: Florida State vs. South Carolina.(-3). This is the local Conf Title Losers Bowl – a name which wouldn’t sound any stupider than the actual one – and the Gamecranks are playing in this bldg for the 2nd time in a row. The Noles are a good enough team, but I’m thinking it’s the ‘Cranks day to wash away the Auburn debacle and beat this 3 for Comrade T.
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Interesting
-Pay no mind to Navy beating Notre Dame, and being a QB sneak away form beating Maryland.
-SMU runs the Run-N-Shoot, I think they’ll have a passing party on Army
-Georgia has really been clicking since AJ Green got back, I just don’t see how UCF will stop AJ Green.
-Robert Griffin is a great athlete, I’d take Baylor.
-If it’s snowing in the Bronx, KSU is a good pick because they’ve got a good back in Daniel Thomas
-Agree big-time on the Alamo Bowl pick, other then Iowa, who Arziona beat that’s decent?
-Noitre Dame is playing competent ball now, I’d take them over the U.
by BaltimoreSportsFan on Dec 17, 2010 8:53 PM EST reply actions
Have you put in a Yahoo card?
Anyway, your GA pick is the smart call — if smart is a word we can use to describe the Yahoo Users, who go a whomping 86% on this one; and the unanimous Expert (Nose) Pickers are right along with ’em. Am I intimidated? Meh.
Welp, Navy gets a thumbs up from the amateur swamis there too (albeit a much weaker-kneed 57%). Meh, Part deux.
Boy, would I like to bet Zona — not just on conf strength, but Foles and Criner are guys you’re going to be hearing about for years, and them beating the spread here would make me look, like, all prescient ‘n’ everything. Still, can’t do it. It’s not the money call, dammit.
To which you could respond, Yeah, and U Dub is what — the money call?!? Touche, but no excuses. Locker can do this.
"Now this is not the end. It is not even the beginning of the end. But it is, perhaps, the end of the beginning." Churchill,1942-- a rebuilding year.
I won't bet on spread of UA-OSU
I’m taking the over, short of 80. Same plan of action for BCSNTG
by BaltimoreSportsFan on Dec 18, 2010 9:54 AM EST up reply actions
+2, good one! Remember when a bowl game was a Big Deal? I do. Wasn’t it cool?
I think there should be obligatory conf champeenships, and they should funnel up to 16 bowls and a 4-team Final Four — sorta like, what’s that other sport, the one where nobody argues about who’s nat’l champ…?
"Now this is not the end. It is not even the beginning of the end. But it is, perhaps, the end of the beginning." Churchill,1942-- a rebuilding year.
Oh, and why on earth is Dec. 25 an Off Day?!? It's un-American! My congressperson's gonna hear about this!
"Now this is not the end. It is not even the beginning of the end. But it is, perhaps, the end of the beginning." Churchill,1942-- a rebuilding year.
Welp, 2 outta 3 ain't bad.
BYU 52 UTEP 24. And not as close as it sounds. So, we saw why Heaps was recruited by the whole country— and isn’t going to be the Ryan Leaf story 4 years ahead of sked after all. Good on him, kid looked tough ‘n’ smart.
NIU 40 Fresno 17. I guess the ol’ NorCal saying is true: The best view of Fresno IS in the rear view mirror of your car. Yikes, what an embarrassment, as the WAC gets waxed. Nobody got this right — except low-man Huguenin [!], if that makes you feel better.
Troy 48 OH 14 [mid-4th]. Somebody should stop this, but there’s now towel-in rule, so…Anyway, Rubbers Rule and I’m not bound by league strictures, so I’m gonna do the, er, Humanitarian thing and call this one (and then my bookie). It’s over, chief.
"Now this is not the end. It is not even the beginning of the end. But it is, perhaps, the end of the beginning." Churchill,1942-- a rebuilding year.
Status report: With the mashed potatoes and punkin pie nicely settled, let's do a quick update, shall we?
Beef ‘O’ Brady’s Bowl: L’ville 31 S. Miss 28. Don’t you hate it when Vegas gets it exactly right — and you didn’t believe ’em? Poop, man. Is there a worse feeling than seeing your pick proving out, just like you called it, then watching a last-ditch drive that ends with 20 dollar bills sprouting wings and gracefully flying upward across your screen?
MAACO Bowl: Boise 26 Utah 3. Check. Boise did remain mad as hell, and da Utes remain one of the real curiosity teams of the year, with three babes-in-the-woods losses that must’ve hurt some Vegas guys bigtime. Hee-hee.
Poinsettia Bowl: San Diego St. 35 Navy 14. Check (or cash is fine, heh-heh). Credit where it’s due: Navy had me thinking for a while there in the 2nd. But this is the Da-glow I liked come back to life, and thx for that, fellas. Very nice turnaround year there.
Hawaii Bowl: Tulsa 62 Hawaii 35. Wow. Just wow. I don’t want to speculate here — no, first I have to get over the hallucinogenic feeling that’s been bothering me since I saw this score come up (Whaaa…? Hey, pass that bowl over here, dude!) and then maybe I’ll do some speculating about this ugly mess. At home. Key-ripes.
OK, troops, Team Titov is 4-3, so still in the Green Zone. Watch this space — with fingers crossed, o’ course.
"Now this is not the end. It is not even the beginning of the end. But it is, perhaps, the end of the beginning." Churchill,1942-- a rebuilding year.
Tough night there, Titov.
You lost me my lunch money. Guess I’m going hungry today….
I don’t have much tolerance for stupid. Or cheese on food that doesn’t need it. -duck
Tough night is right. I was, like, CRUISIN', and suddenly...
WVa spent 60 min looking like confused hillbillies (are there astute hillbillies?) — firing the coach prolly had sth to do with it (remind me to bet against teams that fire coaches before bowls). MIzzou completed 41 passes, racked 500 + yds and…lost. I knew there was a reason I disliked them.
Hmm, maybe I can double down on today’s…
"Now this is not the end. It is not even the beginning of the end. But it is, perhaps, the end of the beginning." Churchill,1942-- a rebuilding year.
Well, you're gonna get the first one.
I don’t have much tolerance for stupid. Or cheese on food that doesn’t need it. -duck
by twistedlogic on Dec 29, 2010 6:02 PM EST up reply actions
Kinda sad I didn't get my bet in on Illinois.
I don’t have much tolerance for stupid. Or cheese on food that doesn’t need it. -duck
by twistedlogic on Dec 29, 2010 7:08 PM EST up reply actions
Yes, as Grandma used to say: A double sawbuck in time saves nine
That may not be exactly right, I’m quoting from memory. But it’s the time thing…
"Now this is not the end. It is not even the beginning of the end. But it is, perhaps, the end of the beginning." Churchill,1942-- a rebuilding year.
Titov
Was leaning pretty strongly on Ok. St, but your recommendation put it over the top. Made a nice chunk on that one last night.
Any solid leans today/tomorrow?
by Wieters Wieners on Dec 30, 2010 9:27 AM EST reply actions
All right, ka-ching cubed
Re OK St: This contest was ’10 Zona writ large — unstoppable in segments (e.g. Foles-Criner TD) and in fact they outgained their opponent here, air and ground…and lost by 26.
This team was not accidentally ranked 14th, beating up Iowa (early) and convincingly handling 3 conf teams w/ quality athletes (U Dub, Cal, UCLA). But they couldn’t sustain, and had a genius for foot-shooting (here a muffed punt, low-caliber INTs). I sort of like Stoops, but have started wondering whether he’s up to the job of directing the supporting cast for a Soles/Criner-level team. (Put otherwise, would Harbaugh have won 10 w/ this team?)
Anyway, yeah, it’s nice to three-sweep . As for today: Welp, I was a little early on the 2-ft-of-snow thing for the Yerkee Bowl — which is too bad, since they couldn’t have cancelled it, like the NFWimpL — and I still like K State, basically on strength o ’sked, over da ’Cuse (Rutgers and Colgate and Maine — oh my…).
Another good lean is SMU (at home) by 8: they aren’t v. good, but if a run ‘n’ shoot goes up early over an option like Army’s, it’ll be hard for the latter (which does Big Games badly, in the instance) to stay close.
Carolina-TN is the same toss-up it was (tho I’ve probably over-credited Nashville as a “home field”). Oh, and I make no apologies for the U Dub-beats-14 call, based largely on Locker’s draft dynamic. I’m bettin’ it.
"Now this is not the end. It is not even the beginning of the end. But it is, perhaps, the end of the beginning." Churchill,1942-- a rebuilding year.
Ahhhh... come on
I need a scale of Titov’s likeability.
At the risk of sounding like a horrible tout, can we get games rated from 1-5 stars so we can tell what your real STONE COLD LOCKS are?
Thanks,
by Wieters Wieners on Dec 30, 2010 11:13 AM EST up reply actions
If y'axe me...
none of today’s sked is really 1-to-5-able — except U Dub, which is either-ended (they’ll beat that 14 or lose by 40).
On the other hand, Team Titov is aware of its role as a Public Service, and is especially sensitive to the spring tuition needs of loyal subscribers: so watch tomorrow’s Jan 1-Jan 10 sked for some very bettable (beatable) spreads. For which, as they say where I live, u ah velkom!
"Now this is not the end. It is not even the beginning of the end. But it is, perhaps, the end of the beginning." Churchill,1942-- a rebuilding year.
Oh come on TEAM TITOV!!!
If you don’t have a particular interest in a game or a lean (a la UNC-Tenn) than its a 1-unit play, or “1-dimer” as Brandon Lang would say. A Titov STONE COLD LOCK is a 5-DIME TITOV BOWL LOCK OF THE YEAR!!!
You can do it.. give me a numeric value.
Using that scale would you give SMU a 3?
by Wieters Wieners on Dec 30, 2010 11:31 AM EST up reply actions
You win, I say SMU's a 3.14159265358979323846264338327950288419716939937510582097494459230781640628620899862803482534211706798214808651 3282306-dimer
"Now this is not the end. It is not even the beginning of the end. But it is, perhaps, the end of the beginning." Churchill,1942-- a rebuilding year.
I will, in turn, wager $314.59 on the match...
You cashed me $500 on the Ok. St. play last night.
First bowl game I took of yours.
by Wieters Wieners on Dec 30, 2010 11:43 AM EST up reply actions
And remember, all proceeds to the Kid's Tuition Fund -- no beer, dammit!
Well, OK, following the impeccably-reasoned AUB and OH St rulings, the Titov Spread-Beatin’ League has just ruled that beer may be derived from Orygun bets as of tomorrow. But it oughta be Oly. You know, a regional thing.
"Now this is not the end. It is not even the beginning of the end. But it is, perhaps, the end of the beginning." Churchill,1942-- a rebuilding year.
I got lost 7 times in this comment...
In any case, you still rolling with Locker tonight?
by Wieters Wieners on Dec 30, 2010 12:03 PM EST up reply actions
Check
But then I’m insane. Like this guy…
http://www.nytimes.com/2010/12/30/us/30locker.html?_r=1
"Now this is not the end. It is not even the beginning of the end. But it is, perhaps, the end of the beginning." Churchill,1942-- a rebuilding year.
Key-ripes, how does a 3-1 day become 1-3?
I know two refs to ask. In Nashville, the head official announced “The game is over” — want to see it on replay? — the coaches shook hands and… then it somehow wasn’t over any more. If you’re TN, you go to court with a tape of the official pronouncing the game completed with your team ahead. Sort of defines “over”, doesn’t it?
But then how about the K-State player apparently penalized for breathing while crossing the goal line? Oh, you say he “called attention to himself”? By, er, raising his hand?!? The ESPN people couldn’t stop dumping on this ref, and I find it very hard to disagree with them. Is “this ref cost them the game” an exaggeration? Not when it’s my money.
That said, it was nice to watch U Dub hand the Cornholers their lunch. Big Twerp teams are sometimes capable of SEC-itis, and this was a good example. Look at the rosters and decide for yourself which was the anomaly game, Sept. or the one for the marbles.
"Now this is not the end. It is not even the beginning of the end. But it is, perhaps, the end of the beginning." Churchill,1942-- a rebuilding year.
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