How can Dave Trembley motivate his players?

It seems that everywhere you look, people are calling for Dave Trembley's job. He's lost the team, he can't motivate the players, etc., etc. So what can he do to make them want to try harder and play better? I've come up with a few things. Feel free to add your ideas to the list.

  1. Threaten to "Felix Pie" any player who doesn't run hard to first base. 
  2. Hit a home run and get a free punch to Julio Lugo's face.
  3. Offer to take the entire team out for snowballs after a win. Marshmallow topping for the player of the game!
  4. Institute an arcade-like reward system for total bases, where players can trade in their tickets for spider rings, switch blade combs, and slinkies. 
  5. Require that each player spend a day working in a cube farm to see what their life COULD be like.
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