Yankees 7, Orioles 5: Too little, too late

I didn't watch today's game, as I suspect is the case with many of you. Jobs, man. Well today I was thankful I didn't have to see this monstrosity because from what I heard from others it was an absolute train wreck. I followed the game thread, I kept an eye on twitter, and I had a friend on gchat giving me some updates. I really would have been better off ignoring the whole thing. I know it got exciting at the end, but even still.

Let's run down the players, shall we?

David Hernandez. Awful. 6 hits, 6 runs, 4 walks, 2 home runs. 3.2 innings.

Lou Montanez. I have something to say to you, Lou Montanez. You are not good at baseball! You just aren't. I'm sorry that you had to hear that from me, but it's the truth. No hits, missing balls in the outfield, sheesh! The fact that you even make me consider the idea of wanting Corey Patterson on this team makes me sick. Because let me tell you something, Lou Montanez, if Corey Patterson ends up back on the Orioles I will go into a spiral of depression. Corey Patterson in the outfield means that the Orioles outfield is no better than it was in 2007. In fact, worse, because now Corey Patterson is three years older. I'm not blaming all of this on you, necessarily, Lou Montanez. It's not your fault that you're not any good and that Felix Pie ripped the shoulder muscle off of the bone and that Nolan Reimold has been injured and/or crappy and that Adam Jones swings at everything under the sun. But do you HAVE to swing at the first pitch the guy throws you after walking Rhyne Hughes in the 9th? I mean, honestly.

(more below the jump)

Garrett Atkins. Your hit and your walk today don't fool me, even if they might fool other people. Nice play at first base, diving only to have the ball go off your glove.

Nolan? Nolan. Thank you for not making me completely miserable today. I know, you GIDP'd back in the 2nd inning, and that sucked, but the rest of your day was quite encouraging. A gutsy bases loaded walk, a single, and home run in the 9th inning are all ways to keep yourself off that bus to Norfolk that Andy MacPhail mentioned today.

And you know. I can't...I just...I can't believe I'm going to bring this up. But that guy? You know the one. He's not actually an Oriole, I don't think. He sometimes goes out on the field, I don't know why. Well, he had three hits today from the leadoff spot and when he came up in the 9th inning with two outs he came back from 0-2 to work a walk and keep the game alive. I think...if he WERE an actual Oriole, he might be in line for an MBP nomination. But he's not.

Matt Wieters, your bases loaded K in the 4th killed us. I know Andy Pettitte is a tough pitcher and I didn't see the strike out, but damn. What a rotten time for it. Nice home run, though, kid. Really, I hear it was quite a beautiful shot.

Wiggy, I know that you've been giving more than has been expected lately, and I appreciate it. I know you've got to come back down to earth sometime and I'm going to try to not be too disappointed. And another home run today is quite a feat. But we really could have used you in those other four at bats, dude.

Hendo and Ohman: represent. Effective bullpens are Birdland.

O's lose 7-5. Another series loss, another sweep. Just a little fun fact for you. After 28 games, the 1988 Orioles were 3-25. That's only four games worse than this team. They won their 8th game of the year on May 22nd. I can't imagine it will take this team that long to win their 8th, but if they keep it up they might match that team's record eventually.

I leave you with a quote from Rick Dempsey made during today's post game: "You put some mediocre pitching out there and that might be what we need to light up our offense." Thanks, Uncle Rick.