OT: PAC 12 Week No. 9, No. 9, No.9...and gnihc-aK again to the Beat of the Fab 4 x 3

The rest are Sat. games…and I’m actually contemplating getting up at 4 here Sun. to watch Snodfart vs the Rubbers @ the Coliseum. Fear the Tree!

I’m sure I never had a 20-win month in PAC 8 picks, and I don’t think I ever did better than 15 in PAC 10 either. Yeah, OK, raising the conf size (esp. by 2 losers) and adding a weekly Regional pick obviously = lowering the bar, but still: right now I’m feeling a little like R. Maris chasing 60-for-162.

Think I should call the McGwire family?

Up 25 in the 3rd and 18 in the 4th, the frickin’ Frogs somehow still couldn’t cover. Credit to BYU for playing all the way, sure, but faaaaaaaaaack. These mid-range “coulda” spreads can be a Chinese water-torturing bitch, y’know…

Not that there was a lot of hope for TCU @ Boise on the 12th, but this slope-off will widen that spread a little more. Anyway, this close-but-no-cigar result no doubt helped make yesterday a real soiled-underwear occasion in Vegas.

Wazoo @ No. 7 Orygun [-35]

Why exactly this spread has been shortening is mysterious, since the OR "JV" won by 43 last wk— and could presumably do so again, if necessary, against a Wazoo squad that is all too comparable, at this pt., to Colo. They’ll start Lobbestael, apparently, but so what? I’d be stunned by an OR W @ less than 30; take ‘em at 35.

OR 43-28. Funny game: both Thomas and James come back – and suck (for them). The "JV" plays the 2nd half and does the job, but credit to the Coogs: they came to play, hung tough, and OR couldn’t get close to tracked enough to cover. OK, I’m not exactly stunned, but still: the OR varsity plays like this in Palo Alto, they get their lunch handed to them.

Colo @ No. 23 ASU [-31]

The Flubbaloes are understandably shellshocked 3 games into their 5 in a row against ranked teams, and they’re not gonna have much fun in the desert, where Osweiler may throw 5. In the 1st half. The Scum Devils showed some fight @ OR, and could (should, actually) run the table from here on out and qualify for a pretty good bowl. Take ‘em at 31, sure.

ASU 48-14. Played to form. Osweiler only got 3 in the 1st half, but the Scum Debbils were coasting. Colo’s zombie run through their first PAC 12 season continues: somehow the Flubs amassed 425 yds and… 14 pts. Well, they TO’ed five [ 5] times. Anyway, last chance for a PAC 12 W will prolly be @ UT Nov. 25. Meanwhile ASU stays on track for 12-2, top 15, good bowl.

Cal [-5] @ UCLA

If Cal is serious about a bowl, they gotta have this – plus Wazoo and the Punkins – ‘cause they’re losing their last two regardless (@ ASU and STA). UCLA continues to wind down (or self-destruct— 4 receivers suspended); I’m not convinced the players are interested in saving Neuheisel (I hope not), so take Cal, despite their crappy OFF, at 5.

UCLA 31-14. Judas Priest, I’m gonna heave. When I mentioned Cal’s "crappy OFF," I wasn’t really thinking 4 INTs. Well, Maynard was. So UCLA scores 24 off TO’s and "[takes] the heat off much-maligned coach Rick Neuheisel…with their most impressive performance of the season." See what I mean about heaving? The line in front of the toilet starts here.

OSU @ Utah [-5]

Da Beavs historically get better toward the end of the season, and last wk could’ve been a sign of that. Mannion, in any case, found his sea legs for sure (376/4). But UT would sure like to win its 1st conf game, y’know…which they MIGHT do, but I wouldn’t bet on it. Take the Punkins to beat this 5, strange as it prolly seems. Hell, they might even win.

UT 27-8. Well, all I got left is dry heaves. PAC 12 Player-of-Last-Wk Mannion throws 3…INTs! Oh, and gets sacked six [ 6] times! Way to not show up, Punkins. Thank cripes I didn’t have to watch this mess, as mediocrity whomping on futility is like a trip to the dentist.

No. 4 Snodfart [-7 ½] at SC

STA has seldom had away-problems playing in the Coliseum in recent yrs, and I don’t think they will here, as this is their chance – now that SC is ranked – to make their BCS case serious. I can see Barkley getting 3 or sth, and a 75-pt game is a real possibility. But take STA and the 7.5.

STA 56-48 (3 OT). Yeah, Barkley got his 3 and it sure WAS a 75-pt game – but it took the OT 2-pt rule for STA to cover (whew). Credit the Rubbers for playing the whole game at/above their talent level — but minus pts for dirty play (one head shot kept STA in the game, literally). Great W for Luck & Co., sure, but did I mention the secondary problem? Uh, yeah. It’ll hurt the BCS ranking – and vs. their bowl opponent.

Zona @ U Dub [-4]

This spread has also shrunk, no doubt as people thought more about the 446 rushing U Dub gave up last wk: look, all Foles needs is 80 or 90 and he’ll throw his brains out on ya. In the end I think Dub will win here and cover the 4 – but I kinda wish it were a 3-spread. Or 2.

U Dub 42-31. I keep writing the same thing, and it’s always true: Foles can’t do it all himself (389/2). When you net rush for 37 yds, you can lead in the 4th but you’re still gonna lose. Anyway, Dub is now embowled thx to this 6 INT slop-fest in which only Polk looked good. I’m happy for Sarkisian, but this is a VERY uneven team looking at big probs in the Sorta OK Bowl.

Regional Pick o’ the Wick: BYU @ TCU [-13 ½]

Welp, Les Horny Grenouilles did right by me last wk, so I’m gonna trust ‘em again – this time in a real game. Which is kind of a leap of faith (heh-heh) since Da Morms are not a bad team… esp. when all you’re asking them to do is stay w/in 2 TDs of somebody. But I think TC is having seriously un-Christian thoughts after last wk’s mass murder, so I’m gonna take ‘em here to win/beat.

TCU 38-28 [See above. Waddayagonnado.]

So yeah, I snuck over the 20-line for Oct. after all, ending at a tidy 21-12. You’re welcome!

Now, ahem, let’s go after the coveted Mr. November title…