Caption Contest: Tyler Henson vs. the Beast
by Stacey on Mar 1, 2011 11:13 AM EST
in Fun & Games
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PrintAdd your caption in the comments, rec the ones you like, the author of the most rec'd caption receives a hearty handshake from me when next we meet.
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Yo stop bitching, I'm not making the roster either....
At least you can spin your head around.
"I don’t have much tolerance for stupid. Or cheese on food that doesn’t need it." -duck
“TJ Eckelburg intimidates Tyler Henson into catching a ball.”
Scientists believe that the first human being to live 150 years has already been born. I believe I am that human being.
by DCO'sfan on Mar 1, 2011 11:16 AM EST reply actions 4 recs
whoa, you gettin all literary 'n shit.
"I put a pepper rub on the scallops so you have a little contrast. You have sweetness from the coconut oil and little acidity from the splash of lemon." – Luke Scott
Writing an essay on Gatsby will do that to you.
Scientists believe that the first human being to live 150 years has already been born. I believe I am that human being.
Respect
Junior year amiright?
You mustn't be afraid to dream a little bigger, darling. Dr. Jones expected numbers in 2011, 30 hr, 60 walks .304/.367/.509.
by WestcoastO'sFan on Mar 2, 2011 1:23 AM EST up reply actions
Was for me.
You come at the king, you best not miss.
by organizedchaos52 on Mar 2, 2011 2:18 AM EST up reply actions
you're too good to be true...
can’t take my eye off of you.
"the secret to a happy ending is knowing when to roll the credits"
If you're staring at me, it better be because I'm the suspect. If not, get back to work or I swear you're all demoted to something that involves touching shit with your hands!
-Eagle Eye
A baseball game is simply a nervous breakdown divided into nine innings. - Earl Wilson
This has got to be
Vernon Dursley’s worst nightmare
"Fairy tales start 'once upon a time...'. Fishing stories start 'now this ain't no bullshit...'."
- Cap'n Phil Harris
by sluggo 2.0 on Mar 1, 2011 11:33 AM EST reply actions 2 recs
“Tyler Henson tracked the ball in its flight, unaware that he himself was being stalked by the Fabrum Bear.”
"I put a pepper rub on the scallops so you have a little contrast. You have sweetness from the coconut oil and little acidity from the splash of lemon." – Luke Scott
by zknower on Mar 1, 2011 11:40 AM EST reply actions 1 recs
“From where I was standing I could see directly into the eye of the great fish!”
“Mammel.”
“Whatever.”
They don't have to be good. They just have to be there. - EME
by Stacey on Mar 1, 2011 11:46 AM EST reply actions 1 recs
ALL GLORY TO THE HYPNOTOAD!
"I believe in Earl Weaver's 'Big Inning Theory of Baseball.' The game was created by a Boog Powell three-run shot. You can look it up."
by Emperor Lrrr on Mar 1, 2011 11:47 AM EST via mobile reply actions
I realize I need to read some books.
If it weren’t for google I’d be totally lost here in some of the quotes here
A baseball game is simply a nervous breakdown divided into nine innings. - Earl Wilson
Scouts, man
They’re ridiculous.
Like a bad, suave dude. You know what I'm sayin'. COOL. SC 7/24/08
by 33 on Mar 1, 2011 11:48 AM EST reply actions 1 recs
The skyline was intricate and voluptuous and enchanted and absurd.
It looked like a Sunday school picture of Heaven to Tyler Henson
FROG SAYS PROTECT HOME
Even as a grown-up, the little boy from the Tootsie Roll Pop commercial still sees owls in his nightmares.
"I found her cross-legged in the window seat, with my good liquor in her bowels, a-firing farts at the waning moon." - The Sot-Weed Factor
by Eat More Esskay on Mar 1, 2011 11:54 AM EST reply actions 4 recs
"Angelos Sees All"
The game ball. Thanks. Roger. I'll put this with my collection of personal achievements. I mean, not right next to the good shit, but still.
he sees you in the outfield...
he knows when you’re at bat!
"the secret to a happy ending is knowing when to roll the credits"
by j.q. higgins on Mar 1, 2011 12:03 PM EST up reply actions
Ph'nglui mglw'nafh Cthulhu R'lyeh wgah'nagl fhtagn.
"I believe in Earl Weaver's 'Big Inning Theory of Baseball.' The game was created by a Boog Powell three-run shot. You can look it up."
by Emperor Lrrr on Mar 1, 2011 12:02 PM EST via mobile reply actions 3 recs
Yell 'heads up, Screech!' one more time
and you’re meat.
Like a bad, suave dude. You know what I'm sayin'. COOL. SC 7/24/08
Legend of the Non-Roster Invitees: The Owls of Ga'Hoole:
You mustn't be afraid to dream a little bigger, darling.
by WestcoastO'sFan on Mar 1, 2011 12:08 PM EST reply actions
"I'm Tyler Henson"
“That bird is a liar!”
“I’m Tyler Henson”
“He’s startin to make me mad! He better shut up!”
“I’m Tyler Henson”
“NO YOU’RE NOT! He’s an imposter, cause I’M Tyler Henson!”
"No Atlantis is too underwater or fictional!"
by Astronaut Mike Dexter on Mar 1, 2011 12:17 PM EST reply actions 1 recs
The majestic mother eagle returns to her nest with a freshly caught outfielder
thrashing in her beak, spoils of another day’s hunt in the picturesque landscapes of west central Florida. Watch the stunning beauty of nature in action as she swallows her prey whole, only to regurgitate a softer, more palletable meal for her young.
"Tiger got to hunt, bird got to fly; Man got to sit and wonder 'why, why, why?' Tiger got to sleep, bird got to land; Man got to tell himself he understand.."
Tyler, surely you can catch a leetle rabbit to bring home to mama
Duh, nope, nope, nope, I don’t wanna
"Fairy tales start 'once upon a time...'. Fishing stories start 'now this ain't no bullshit...'."
- Cap'n Phil Harris
by sluggo 2.0 on Mar 1, 2011 12:33 PM EST reply actions 1 recs
I'm going to go super nerdy here...
“One moment only it stared out…as from some great window immeasurably high there stabbed northward a flame of red, the flicker of a piercing Eye… The Eye was not turned on them, it was gazing north…but Frodo Henson at that dreadful glimpse fell as one stricken mortally.”
What up?
The all seeing eye predicts.......Bowie
You cant spell POOP without O's
by matman008 on Mar 1, 2011 12:45 PM EST reply actions 1 recs
You're not a Colombian soccer player are you?!?
see here for context
Just because you know how to read, doesn't mean you'll like the book.
OMG
“I did it to see if the owl could fly” ?!?!?
Looks like Colombian footballers are no brighter than American baseballers.
Like a bad, suave dude. You know what I'm sayin'. COOL. SC 7/24/08
by 33 on Mar 1, 2011 4:46 PM EST up reply actions
"in addition to [3 months of jail time] he faces a maximum fine of ... about 26 dollars"
Just because you know how to read, doesn't mean you'll like the book.
by arlingtonOsFan on Mar 2, 2011 9:43 AM EST up reply actions
Wow, they take the this is birdland motive pretty seriously here.
Leader of the "Draft Julio Jones Campaign"
by BaltimoreSportsFan on Mar 1, 2011 3:06 PM EST reply actions
“Tyler Henson, competing for a job in the Orioles’ owltfield.”
by Sierra Matt on Mar 1, 2011 3:28 PM EST reply actions 1 recs
Mr. Henson, hate to be a bother, but I've got a delivery from one Harold Potter.
Marked most urgent.
"I don’t have much tolerance for stupid. Or cheese on food that doesn’t need it." -duck
I have to say...
most of these jokes were pretty cornea.
"things like locig and prrofreading are actually valued here" - zknower
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