(the sound of a grown man weeping softly)
RED ALERT! WHOOP WHOOP WHOOP! We've sighted Felix Pie batting leadoff at a bearing of 229 mark 267. All hands prepare to be boarded. Ask for no quarter, for none shall be given. The time for mercy is long past. God save us all.
White Sox (P. Humber - R) @ Orioles (T. Hunter - R)
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