A Timeline of Brian Roberts First Rehab Game


7:03 Tides take the field. Roberts defies odds by jogging out to second base. Tensions mount as young inner-city little leaguer runs out with Roberts, potentially getting under Brian's feet and causing a fall.

7:10 Josh Stinson gets 3 outs on something like 8 pitches, midway through 1st, Roberts coming up to bat and I'm almost not prepared because my Tides Basket is taking a long time to get from the old lady in concessions

7:15 Roberts lines a double to the LF corner. He goes in standing up. I'm assuming "double" and "stand up double" will forever be the same thing for the rest of his career. He later scores on a sac fly.

7:25 Roberts takes the field for the top of the 2nd


Brian's batting gloves fall out of his back pocket WHAT HAPPENS NEXT!?


  • He bends over and tweaks his back, which triggers his gout, which leads to spontaneous combustion and another 60 day DL stint
  • He activates his Life Alert system and receives immediate medical assistance in getting them off the ground
  • He picks them up and resumes activities with no issues

At this point in the game, I become enamored with the old and possibly senile spectators behind me. The combination of "I don't give a shit" old and "I don't know my name anymore" senility is absolutely perfect for a situation where shouting insults and encouragement is acceptable, such as a baseball game. Here are some of my favorites that I can remember:

"I've seen better swings from a tree" Was it a windstorm, or was it a treant situation, where the tree was violently attacking anything around it?
"I hit my sister harder than that" I think I know what you mean and I think I know what you think you meant, but what you actually said might get you put in assisted living real fast
"Cmon Pridie, if ever a situation for a homerun was now, it's about time. Always about time. ALLways about time. ALWAYS ABOUT time." This was actually a back-and-forth between two old guys sitting right next to eachtother, trying to outemphasize themselves. What's it always about again?
"Cmon Canzalero, take a better lead! You forget what being on first is like Canzelero?" That's Russ Canzle- you know what, your version is better, his name is Canzalero now.

PANIC MOMENT #2 -- RYAN ROHLINGER STEALS SECOND Rohlinger gets a break towards second base and slides headfirst, catching the lip of his helmet on the bag, jarring his neck up and down a bit and getting a little shook up. How does Brian handle it:

  • He gets empathy neck spasms just from witnessing the familiar event and is put on the 60 day DL
  • He activates his Life Alert system and receives immediate medical attention on the scene to prevent any injuries
  • He has a conversation with Rohlinger that probably goes like "You can really mess yourself up like that man, hope you're okay"

9:00ish Tides are pushing to rally in the bottom of the 8th. No out, two on, Roberts to the plate. Works the count full, and then gets his second hit of the night, a flare up the middle to load the bases. He would end up scoring the go-ahead run.

Roberts looked poised at the plate, working the count to his favor in both of his hits. In the field, he handled everything fine, but I would be challenged to compare him and Ryan Flaherty. I have to think Brian's value to the club would be in a DH role, or a Sunday 2B. After last night, I definitely wouldn't think his glove would be any kind of liability at all, but don't expect it to be a big boost either. I'd expect below average range, dependable fielding and throwing.

There were a LOT of Roberts t shirts and jerseys in the crowd, and a fair amount of "O"s during the national anthem. It was fantastic seeing Roberts play down in Norfolk, but I won't be the only one hoping that Brian never has to be in Harbor Park again.

FanPosts are user-created content and do not necessarily reflect the views of the editors of Camden Chat or SB Nation. They might, though.

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