My dear Camden Chatters. My dear (here there is a long, rambling list of every Camden Chatter - yes, even you). Also my good lurkers that I welcome back at last to Camden Chat. Today is the one hundred sixty-second game of the season. It is one hundred sixty-two today! I hope you are all enjoying yourselves as much as I am.
I shall not keep you long. I have called you all together for a purpose. Indeed, for three purposes! First of all, to tell you that I am immensely fond of you all, and that one hundred sixty-two games is too short a time to blog among such excellent and admirable Orioles fans. I don't know half of you half as well as I should like; and I like less than half of you half as well as you deserve. Secondly, to celebrate my final regular season game thread of the year. I should say, OUR final regular season game thread of the year, for it is, of course, also the last regular season Orioles game for you as well.
It is also, if I should be allowed to refer to ancient history, almost three years and two months anniversary since the arrival of Buck Showalter as manager - though the fact that would be so significant slipped my mind at the time. We were 32-73 then, and individual game threads did not seem so important. The game thread was very splendid, however, though I had a bad cold at the time, I remember, and could only say 'thag you very buch'. I now repeat it more correctly: Thank you very much for coming to my little game thread, night in and night out.
Thirdly and finally, I wish to make an announcement. I regret to announce that - though, as I said, one hundred sixty-two games is far too short a time to spend among you - this is the END. I am going. I am leaving NOW. Good-bye!
Don't worry. You're not getting rid of me that easily. Although if you wish I was really going, then I'm sorry.
I will be turning 30 later this year and the Orioles have won more games than this season seven times in my life. If they win on Sunday and it is an 85-win season, the number of seasons higher than that is five.
Much as this season has been disappointing, it helps to keep that in perspective, and plus, in the long winter months, we will wish we had Orioles baseball, even this frustrating 2013 brand of Orioles baseball. Enjoy today, friends, because it is the last O's game that will count for six months.