8:05 on FOX, y'all. Let's take this stupid, pointless day as a chance to talk a lot of B.S. about players that have no real bearing on our team. Rock and roll, hoochie koo.

	Today's Starting Pitchers	GS	IP	ERA	WHIP	BAA	HR	BB	K	W-L
	Ben Sheets - RH - Brewers	18	123.0	2.85	1.11	.235	13	28	108	10-3
	Cliff Lee - LH - Indians	18	124.2	2.31	1.03	.234	5	20	106	12-2

	National League	AB	AVG	OBP	HR	RBI
1	Hanley Ramirez - SS - Marlins	373	.311	.391	23	45
2	Chase Utley - 2B - Phillies	364	.291	.372	25	69
3	Lance Berkman - 1B - Astros	334	.347	.443	22	73
4	Albert Pujols - DH - Cardinals	286	.350	.466	18	50
5	Chipper Jones - 3B - Braves	298	.376	.472	18	51
6	Matt Holliday - RF - Rockies	309	.337	.421	14	51
7	Ryan Braun - LF - Brewers	377	.286	.324	23	66
8	Kosuke Fukudome - CF - Cubs	326	.279	.383	7	36
9	Geovany Soto - C - Cubs	316	.288	.369	16	56

	American League	AB	AVG	OBP	HR	RBI
1	Ichiro - RF - Mariners	391	.304	.366	3	21
2	Derek Jeter - SS - Yankees	352	.284	.345	5	42
3	Josh Hamilton - CF - Rangers	377	.310	.367	21	95
4	Alex Rodriguez - 3B - Yankees	279	.312	.392	19	53
5	Manny Ramirez - LF - Red Sox	328	.293	.389	18	60
6	Milton Bradley - DH - Rangers	269	.316	.440	19	57
7	Kevin Youkilis - 1B - Red Sox	328	.314	.381	15	63
8	Joe Mauer - C - Twins	301	.322	.418	5	41
9	Dustin Pedroia - 2B - Red Sox	395	.314	.357	9	47

OK, seriously. When is Dave Trembley goiing to learn?

Coming into tonight's game, lefties were hitting .391 off of Jamie Walker, with three homers in 10.1 innings. So Trembley brought Walker in with two out and Sarfate having just struck out a couple dudes to face Mauer and Morneau.

Mauer goes yard immediately.

????!!!!

Mauer was also 6-for-9 against Walker.

????!!!!!!??!?!?!?!?!!

DAVE, WHAT ARE YOU DOING?

Believe it or not, I don't think I'm a genius. Hear me out -- I don't even think I'm all that smart. I don't think I see anything that any of you couldn't. But we're not talking about rocket science or "weird stats that no one's ever heard of" here. We're talking about at-bats and hits. And division.

Come on. Come on, man. Just stop it.

I came into tonight's game late, and it was 5-0 Mariners. First thing I saw was Jay Payton go deep. The Orioles went on to win 8-7, after I immediately proclaimed that we would win tonight. Just had a feelin', ya know? The first thing I see is a Jay Payton home run. We're winning this thing.

I missed another fabulous start from Adam Loewen, who went two and two-thirds (60 pitches, 33 strikes) with three walks, a strikeout, four hits, five earned runs, and a homer allowed to Adrian Beltre. His ERA is now 7.85. Does anyone really think this dude deserves a rotation spot instead of Matt Albers? Really? I know the team is invested in Loewen, but at what point do you have to STOP THE INSANITY?

The guy can't pitch. Trembley is on record as saying we're foolishly carrying thirteen pitchers (and thus, a bench consisting of Brandon Fahey, Guillermo Quiroz and Jay Payton) because Loewen can't go deep into games.

He's not getting any better about it! You can stick him in the bullpen (since optioning him isn't really an, um, option), but that'll spell disaster, most likely. A couple of years ago, one of the Baseball Prospectus guys said that Loewen might be better off there. The way he simply can't keep the ball over the plate, I have my doubts. Sure he could pump his fastball, but he can't control that thing any better than the rest of his junk.

So what do you do with him? He's taking up a valuable spot on the 25-man roster.

After he was gone, it went a lot better. Matt Albers and Jamie Walker gave up an earned run each (both on Ichiro's two-run bomb off of Walker, but we've already discussed the stupidity of matching Ichiro by the book, as he kills lefties and had healthy numbers against Walker career), but RAN-DOOOOOR! pitched two scoreless right after Loewen, Bradford went one and a third, and Sherrill shut the door after some drunks ran onto the field. I had the dreadful Mariners TV broadcast, but apparently Gary Thorne said they were "not taking it lightly" on the knuckleheads (that one credit to the Seattle booth) that got out there.

That gives Shutdown eight saves on the year, five against the Mariners. And that skirt-wearing weiner Erik Bedard is still too afeared of the mighty, mighty O's. As well he should be!

You know who I hate? Yuniesky Betancourt. 3-for-4. That guy kills us. Get him out of here.

Markakis was 2-for-3 with two walks, Millar managed a sac fly, Huff was 1-for-5 with an RBI, Roberts homered in the eighth to put us up for good, and Adam Jones (Player of the Year, 2010 Seattle Mariners) was 3-for-4 with a two-run, go-ahead double in the seventh.

Much fun all around! Now we have a bunch of games in Chicago against the White Sox, so that wraps up our season series against them, too. Let's do it to it!

Another series won. Can't argue with that.

Photo © Greg Flume / Getty Images

Pictured above is Eric O'Flaherty, Patron Saint of Blowing Games. In another nail-biter, the O's AGAIN came from behind to score a 5-4 win over Seattle, giving the Birds their first four-game sweep since 2004. O'Flaherty was inexplicably brought into the game in the bottom of the eighth and gave up a solo home run to an ice cold Aubrey Huff, which turned out to be the game winner.

Now, look, I'm going to be a realist for a second. This team can't keep winning games by coming from behind. It's not going to work.

Now that I'm done with that, THIS IS BIRDLAND, G!

Luis Luis came through with a 2-for-2 day at the plate and made some fine defensive plays behind our pitchers, who started off on the familiar rocky road thanks to Daniel Cabrera. Cabrera went six innings, which he should get some credit for after allowing two first inning solo home runs to Ichiro and Raul Ibanez, putting the O's in a hole right away. Over the six innings, Cabrera allowed four earned runs on five hits and four walks, with five strikeouts.

The difference between Cabrera now and the old Cabrera is he throws slower. It's probably on purpose, with him trying to control the ball better, but it does hurt his K-rate and does make him more hittable, which is going to give him a lot of really horrific outings, like it did last year. The best thing he had going for him was he was really hard to hit; you either struck out or walked, in most cases. Since his walk rates aren't falling any, that means he's letting MORE guys on base. Which is bad news.

But, again, now that I'm done with that, THIS IS BIRDLAND, SON!

Jamie Walker got a couple of outs today, and Dennis Sarfate picked up the win. I really like Dennis the Menace so far -- that guy's philosophy seems to be, "Hey, you. Hit THIS." His fastball is really nice, he's getting ahead in counts, and he's just doing a really good job. He's so good, in fact, that I think we could be looking at a top-notch setup guy or even a closer. Not that we need another closer right now, since George Sherrill is now 4-for-4 in save opportunities, as he got a 1-2-3 ninth inning on Betancourt, Ichiro and Lopez.

Carlos Silva was very Carlos Silva for the Mariners, going seven, allowing four earned on nine hits with no walks and five strikeouts.

For the O's, Brian Roberts went 3-for-4 with two RBI to salvage what had been a pretty bad series for him, and Melvin Mora hit a two-run homer in the third, capping a three-run inning where the Birds took their first lead of the game.

The Mariners tied it in the top of the fourth on an idiotic "defensive indifference" play by Cabrera. Let's not even get into it.

Five in a row. First place. Five in a row!

I'm getting some serious "first half of 2005" vibes about this team, but this is a team that's built in a way that it could get better as the season goes on. If they steal enough games early...who knows?

Jay Payton got to pinch run. Never complain about PT, Jay!

We're having some good fun to start this season. On to Arlington! Let's mess with Texas.

I do send one recommendation to M's fans, though: Be careful about hoping John McLaren gets the ax. You might get Sam Perlozzo.