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Children and the Red Sox

Real quick and totally pointless.


You may remember this kid from getting a Shelley Duncan autograph, pictured above, which sent his mom into a tizzy because I'm terribly certain that this child has never in his life heard that the Red Sox suck. Shelley Duncan should be a great role model for all children.

Maybe Shelley Duncan remembers being a kid, and busting chops. Busting chops is an undeniably fun activity. If you can't derive any joy from chop-busting, then what fun are you?

How many times do you think this kid has said "Yankees suck!" Shelley Duncan should've called him a dork in the autograph, too. And I just love this photo. "OK, Billy, lean on the windowsill with your left hand, and make a Dawson's Creek face."

Shelley Duncan 1, Red Sox Nation 0.


I'm aware that I'm not about to blow the minds of most of y'all who are already aware of this, but I hate this photo for the following reasons:

1. It's overused to death. Every bandwagon ninny on Myspace has this thing somewhere on their stupid page.

2. It's not even real. As if American children are this passionate about sports. Come on. Maybe if this kid was flipping off a hamburger Happy Meal because he likes Chicken McNuggets better, I'd buy it.

Also, can I ask a question for any Red Sox fan that might read? This is a genuine question.

Why does every single Red Sox fan have to say "I'm a huge Sox fan"?

Why do they have to be huge?

And if the answer is, "Because in Red Sox Nation, all we HAVE are huge fans!" please don't kid yourself or me.

Can't someone admit, like in almost all other fanbases, that they casually follow the sport? You should see how many Orioles "fans" whine by July every season and start demanding to talk about football.