:format(webp)/cdn.vox-cdn.com/uploads/chorus_image/image/60494861/alg_pirate_jack_sparrow.0.0.jpg)
Avast mateys! It be time again for the Hatted Pink Masses to be crawlin' out o' the bunghole! Arrrrrrr!
Jon Lester be the bilge rat that's startin' fer them barnacles of the Bay State. The way he be handlin' the Orioles is not a fine t'ing at all, him havin' gone 9-0 against them fer his career. Three times this year alone, he be hoistin' the Jolly Roger o'er our landlubber Birds.
Blow me down! It's that scallywag Dave Hernanzdez shootin' the cannonballs for the Parrots Birds. He'll need to lob his fodder more sharply than he has in the past—him sportin' a 5.79 ERA against the Sox hordes this year—or shiver me timbers, Dave Trembley will hoist him on the yardarm! This be the one day that a matey shouldn't be surprised to see Captain Hook makin' an appearance!
Short of Luuuke's shot off the starboard side yesterday (a real beauty 'twere, me laddies), them Orioles basically be walkin' the plank against these swaggerin' invaders from the north. They'll need to play smartly if they want to be dancin' a hornpipe at th'end o' the day, Ayyyyyyy!
Enjoy the game, me hearties! This post be brought to you in honor o' International Talk Like A Pirate Day, yarrrrr!
An' to ye Jewish O's fans out thar, Shanah Tovah, mateys! -zk
Red Sox vs Orioles coverage | Red Sox vs Orioles preview | Over the Monster
Go O's! Bring home th' booty fer once!