My dear Camden Chatters. My dear (here there is a long, rambling list of every Camden Chatter - yes, even you). Also my good lurkers that I welcome back at last to Camden Chat. Today is the one hundred sixty-second game of the season. It is one hundred sixty-two today! I hope you are all enjoying yourselves as much as I am.
I shall not keep you long. I have called you all together for a purpose. Indeed, for three purposes! First of all, to tell you that I am immensely fond of you all, and that one hundred sixty-two games is too short a time to blog among such excellent and admirable Orioles fans. I don't know half of you half as well as I should like; and I like less than half of you half as well as you deserve. Secondly, to celebrate my final game thread of the year. I should say, OUR final game thread of the year, for it is, of course, also the last Orioles game for you as well.
It is also, if I should be allowed to refer to ancient history, two months anniversary since Buck Showalter's arrival in the dugout in Baltimore - though the fact that would be so significant slipped my mind at the time. We were 32-73 then, and individual game threads did not seem so important. The game thread was very splendid, however, though I had a bad cold at the time, I remember, and could only say 'thag you very buch'. I now repeat it more correctly: Thank you very much for coming to my little game thread.
Thirdly and finally, I wish to make an announcement. I regret to announce that - though, as I said, one hundred sixty-two games is far too short a time to spend among you - this is the END. I am going. I am leaving NOW. Good-bye!
Psych. Just playing. I'm not really going anywhere. I'm a huge nerd and wanted to make a giant Lord of the Rings reference. What do you want? You're all going to mostly be watching the Ravens vs. the Steelers while this game is going on anyway, and don't act like you aren't.
Speaking of the NFL, if you want to talk about football with your fellow Camden Chatters, please mostly keep the discussion confined to the week's NFL open thread in the FanPost section. I just linked it for you, so there's no excuse for laziness. Hold control and click it. Bam, you've opened a new tab. If you're using a browser that doesn't have tabs... Christ, get the hell out of the dark ages.
Here's hoping the Orioles can send off 2010 in a winning fashion, to take something positive into next year. Here's hoping we never see the likes of Millwood and Lugo in O's uniforms again. Here's hoping Crowley's luck to be in f*cking baseball finally runs out. Here's hoping for winning O's baseball in 2011. Go O's!