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Game 122: Orioles (47-74) @ Angels (66-59), 10:05pm

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If you're watching tonight's O's game, you might end up sprawled out like Blake Davis, emptying your stomach into the most convenient receptacle.
If you're watching tonight's O's game, you might end up sprawled out like Blake Davis, emptying your stomach into the most convenient receptacle.

If you are watching this game tonight, you may be at the point where you need to go into rehab for your Orioles addiction. That means you're watching a Friday night game on the west coast in August when the O's are 27 games below .500, and Jo-Jo Reyes is the starting pitcher, and Vladimir Guerrero is batting cleanup once again, and Dan Haren is the opposing pitcher for the Angels. You are getting pretty close to that rock bottom.

This is not the place to seek treatment. The only twelve steps here are from home plate to the dugout every time Haren strikes somebody out. Probably Mark Reynolds, who's almost assured to take the Orioles single-season strikeout crown away from Mickey Tettleton some time between now and the end of the season. If a higher power exists, it clearly hates the Orioles and their fans, and it's sure not restoring us to sanity any time soon. So none of that stuff here.

This is the place to find company as you metaphorically stagger to the nearest sewer grate and vomit what you've consumed from several paper bag-encased bottles of Mad Dog 20/20, then return to your pile of newspapers on the benches under the trees at the corner of St. Paul and Fayette. We will not judge you here, but we may soon start metaphorically vomiting as well, so you can't blame us if any gets on your shoes. The po-po will leave us all alone as long as we don't start peeing on cars.